Code 3 · Written lessons

Have you ever started a game with your child only to see them get distracted immediately? Or watched them run away just as you begin showing the word cards?

Maybe you’ve noticed that your child is very sensitive to sounds or lights, or that they’re naturally shy and slow to join in.

Don’t worry. Every child is different.

Each one has their own timing, preferences, and way of learning.

If you truly want to guide your child toward reading without stress, you must learn to read your child first—to understand what helps them stay engaged.

In this chapter, you’ll learn how to adjust your approach with simple solutions, practical examples, and easy activities you can try together.

1. Instant Distraction: “Look, an airplane!”

Your child begins the session, but their eyes immediately wander somewhere else.

This is very common—especially when the environment is full of stimulation.

Practical solutions

• Reduce the number of words to three, placing the most loved one (for example CAT) in the center.

• Give your child a “magic brush” (a dry marker or small stick) to touch the word after you say it. When the hands are busy, the mind focuses.

Activity

Prepare three cards:

CAT — BALL — APPLE

Say one word and ask your child to touch the correct card using the “magic brush.”

Repeat several times, always rewarding with a smile and a warm “Well done!”

2. High Energy: When Your Child Can’t Sit Still

Some children have so much energy that sitting still feels impossible.

If they run away before the session ends, don’t panic. Turn the session into movement.

Practical solutions

• Turn the flash session into an obstacle course: place the word cards on the floor as stepping stones.

• Use a very soft whispering voice. A quiet voice often makes children lower their own energy and focus.

Activity

Place five word cards on the floor, one step apart.

Say the word MOM, and your child jumps onto the matching card.

After every three words, add a fun break—a double jump or a small somersault.

3. Shyness or Low Participation: When the Child Watches but Doesn’t Speak

Some children are shy or feel pressure when asked to respond.

The key is not to force them, but to invite them gently into the game.

Practical solutions

• Use the “magic gem choice”: present two bright cards and say, “Choose your magic gem.” Accept any response—a touch, a smile, or a gesture.

• Use a puppet or stuffed animal as the “word messenger.” Let the puppet “say” the word so the child responds to the toy instead of directly to you.

Activity

Choose two cards, for example:

SUN — MOON

Ask your child: “Which one do you want today?”

After the child chooses, let the puppet say the word and invite the child to respond with a gesture or smile.

4. Strong Sensory Preferences: Helping Sensitive Children

Some children love touch. Others are sensitive to colors, sounds, or visual stimulation.

Here’s how to adapt the word cards.

Practical solutions

• For tactile learners: create raised letters using glue or string so the child can trace them with their fingers.

• For visually sensitive children: use simple black-andwhite cards and add color only to the borders.

• For sound-sensitive children: avoid loud clapping; instead use a soft bell or gentle chime to signal the next word.

Activity

Create a tactile card for the word:

FRIEND

Use string or glue to form raised letters.

Guide your child’s finger slowly along each letter while saying the word together.

5. Mild Speech or Language Delays

If your child has mild language delays or attends speech therapy, it’s important to proceed calmly and adapt the activity.

Practical solutions

• Use short words (3–4 letters), such as SUN or BREAD.

• Use the echo-word technique: say the word twice, clapping rhythmically. Your child repeats only the last syllable first, then gradually the whole word.

• Use a 30-second sand timer so the child knows exactly when the activity ends. Predictability helps reduce stress.

• Bring the word cards to speech therapy sessions so the therapist can integrate them into their work.

Activity

Practice the word BREAD using the echo technique.

You say: “Bread.” The child repeats: “ead.”

Gradually build toward the full word.

Quick Adjustment Table: A Fast Reset Button

Problem Change Just One

Thing Example

Problem Change Just One

Thing Example

Child runs away Change the location Move from couch to hallway

Child shouts Lower your voice Normal voice becomes whisper

Child won’t speak Use a character or

puppet Talking stuffed animal

Child touches everything

Change the card texture Smooth paper → felt

Managing Time: The Flexible Timer

Adjust session length based on your child’s age.

• Age 2 → 10 seconds per word, total 30 seconds (3 words)

• Age 3 → 20 seconds per word, total 45 seconds (the classic Code 3 rhythm)

• Age 4+ → 30 seconds per word, total 60 seconds

Never increase time to “make up” for missed sessions. Increase it only if your child asks for more.

A Practical 60-Second Example

1. Show the card HAPPY with green letters. 2. Whisper the word and gently tap your forehead to attract attention. 3. If your child looks away, place the card in a puppet’s mouth and let the puppet say it. 4. If distraction continues, switch to a black-and-white card for stronger visual contrast. 5. End the session with a hug and finish the game.

Try the same word again tomorrow, perhaps using raised letters.

Final Exercise

During your next session, watch your child carefully.

Identify one sign of distraction, restlessness, or hesitation.

Apply one adjustment from this chapter and observe what changes.

Then write down:

• how long your child stayed engaged

• what helped them focus

These observations will become one of your most valuable tools.

SECRET 3.4

Change only one element at a time—color, voice, or location.

Too many changes confuse a child.

One thoughtful adjustment can bring attention back without creating stress.